I Can't Believe You're Still Not Over Her

Last night, we were texting as always. But everytime I asked "How're you?" or "Watchu doin?", you kept quiet. So I asked "Why is it that everytime I ask how you were or what were you doing, you'd keep quiet?".

You weren't over her. That was why. You told me so. Of course, I just took in a deep breath & loudly sighed. You're 19, sayang & yet you were the one who said I sound funny cussing every single bad word I know when I knew he was cheating on me. How do you think I look at you now knowing that you're STILL not over her?

Okay. Fine. So it takes time to heal yourself. But you were practically pissed at her after what she's done to you. You yourself said you've wasted every single penny of yours on her.

And after that, you were practically fine. You made me laugh which in the end made you laugh as well. So, why the sudden thought of her? "I'm losing her" you said. Do you have any idea how pathetic you sound?

She's not the only girl in the world. There're better ones out there. Sure, they'll be different than her but why can't you just take the chance? It was a very stupid timing for you to have said you liked me & guess what? That was the night before you thought of her out of nowhere.

She's a BITCH. She doesn't deserve you. You deserve BETTER, sayang.

Today, we barely texted each other. Obviously you were thinking of her again & wondering why you're in such a situation where the both of you are no longer together. Don't tell me you've repented your decision?

If you did, I really wish I was there to slap you. I'm in the mood where I feel like giving you the same tight slap I gave to Syahmi.

My mind kept wandering off somewhere, nowhere near my body I suppose. I couldn't concentrate in whatever I do so, this is such a perfect moment since I have SPM in 2 months & trials aren't even over yet.

You were the only one on my mind the whole entire day. Even when I went to the bazaar with Lily, I couldn't stop talking about you & I told her that I've fallen for you. First, my status was "I think I feel it: I think I've fallen for you". Now, it's "What if... it was me who met you first? How different would it be... if that really happened?".

Don't I sound as pathetic as you right now but with a hint of desperation? I do.

I guess I'll stop rambling on & on about myself now. Wouldn't want to go... so, you finally replied me & I texted you like what? 3-4 hours ago? "I'm so sorry, sayang. Really not in the mood right now :'(".

I'm seriously pissed at you to be frank, but I don't want to make your situation even worse as it is. So I replied "It's okay, (insert name here) ... you might wanna get some sleep. I'm sure you have a big day ahead of you tomorrow... goodnight, sayang. Take care, okay...? :)".

Of course, the smiley face I put in proves nothing of how I really feel right now. Not in the mood? You're losing her? Get a life. You know, as much as it hurts for me to say it, I hate you for telling me you like me. Because of that, I've fallen for you. I already said I sound as pathetic as you right now. Never said that I wasn't. So, a little suggestion or advice for you, stop chasing her.

She's not worth your time. At all.

Well, I gotta go to bed now since I have to wake you up for sahur which is in 3 hours time. My situation at the moment sounds like Taylor Swift's You Belong With Me, but more of a slow ballad. A sad song I mean. Goodnight.

shn... is almost barely in the mood for anything

5 I had & you felt like the one,
You told me you've moved on,
But you're not even done.
She caused you your pain,
Yet now you don't even bother,
I hate you for that,
And the flower had wither.