9/19/10

A Heart-Breaking Dream

I had more than one dream last night actually, but the only one I can remember from the moment I woke up until now is the one with you in it.

Why's it heart-breaking you ask? Well, as embarrassing as it is for me to going have to share it with y'all here, blogging is my only way.

We're lying on my bed with the door to my room locked, I was on top of you, doing my best to 'make it up to you'.

And what happened? You pushed me away while saying "Get off!", giving me that disgusted look you only give to them.

It may have only been a dream & not real, but it was real enough to tear me into pieces.

So tell me, what am I to you now? Sure, you still say "Isn't my family yours too?" or "Aren't my parents yours too?" but there's no need to remind me.

I still consider y'all as my own family & you as mine, but what about you? Do you still consider me as yours or is there someone else in mind?

If I'm bothering you, tell me. If I'm in your way, tell me. If I irritate and/or annoy the shit outta you, tell me.

Because as each day pass, I start to question about what we have more & more which I'm not even sure is there anymore.

Tell me you need me like I need you, tell me I'm all you see out of all the girls out there, tell me you love me & that you don't ever wanna lose me.

Because, dear, if you don't, then other than the fact that I love you too much, there's no other reason for me to stay any longer.

You're giving me mixed signs, showing me mixed emotions/expressions, telling me things I already know & need not know no more.

Did I do that to you? Because if I did, then I'm sorry for making you worried & confused as I am now.

*sighs in disappointment* I don't know what to think anymore. I've got too much up on my mind. I better rest.

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